Emotional dynamics in coaching can make you avoid the agreed scope

Recently I coached one of my clients and experienced that setting boundaries in the session was challenging, although I know it’s essential for my client’s progress. Sometimes, we may find the scope of our work expanding, making it difficult to stay focused on the goals you’ve set. This can happen for a variety of reasons, and it’s important that we explore these together. By understanding the underlying causes of why a client may want to broaden the scope, we can ensure that our work remains effective, meaningful, and directed toward the client’s success.

If you were the client, here are some reasons why you might feel the urge to expand the scope of our coaching:

1. Uncertainty or anxiety about specific goals

At times, you may feel unsure or anxious about the goals we’ve set. These feelings are completely natural and can sometimes lead to wanting to shift the focus of our sessions, perhaps as a way to avoid tackling difficult areas. It might seem easier to bring up new topics rather than facing the challenges of your initial goals head-on. If you notice this happening, it’s important that we address these emotions together. By confronting the anxiety behind the goal, we can find ways to make it more manageable while keeping your progress on track.

2. Desire for validation

It’s common to seek validation, and you might expand the scope of our coaching as a way to gain reassurance across various aspects of your life. I understand the need to feel secure and supported in multiple areas, but it’s essential to remember that focusing too broadly can blur the boundaries of our work. Together, we can acknowledge your need for affirmation while keeping our sessions concentrated on the goals that will have the most impact for you. By doing so, we’ll ensure that your efforts lead to tangible outcomes.

3. Lack of clarity

Sometimes, the expansion of our coaching scope can stem from a lack of clarity around what you truly want to achieve. It’s okay if your goals feel a bit unclear or if you’re still exploring different aspects of your life or career. However, it’s important that we establish a clear direction for our work. If you’re struggling to define your goals, we can dedicate time to exploring what’s truly important to you. Once we clarify your objectives, it will be easier to stay focused and make meaningful progress without feeling scattered.

4. Fear of failure

Fear of failure can sometimes push you to broaden the scope of our sessions. When the initial goals seem overwhelming, it might feel safer to introduce new topics or spread your focus. This can serve as a psychological buffer, protecting you from the possibility of not meeting the original objectives. My role as your coach is to support you through this fear. We can break down your goals into smaller, achievable steps, so you don’t feel pressured by the larger picture. By focusing on steady progress, you’ll feel more in control and less worried about the outcome.

5. Overwhelm and complexity

Life can feel overwhelming, and when everything seems interconnected, it can be tempting to bring up new issues in each session. You might feel that resolving one area of your life depends on addressing others, leading to scope expansion. While it’s true that many aspects of life are connected, trying to tackle everything at once can lead to burnout. Let’s prioritize the most pressing issues and address them one step at a time. This way, you’ll see progress without feeling overwhelmed by the complexity of it all.

6. Perfectionism or high ambition

If you’re someone who tends to be a high achiever or a perfectionist, you may feel the need to address multiple areas simultaneously, thinking that more goals will lead to faster results. I completely understand your drive to achieve, but it’s important to recognize that spreading your focus too thin can slow your progress. By narrowing our focus to a few key objectives, you’ll find that you can make more meaningful and sustainable progress. We’ll work together to set realistic and achievable goals that align with your ambitions, but also allow you the space to succeed without unnecessary pressure.

How we can manage scope expansion

Recognizing the reasons behind your desire to expand the scope of coaching is the first step toward managing it. As your coach, I’m here to support you with empathy and clarity. While it’s important to explore different areas of your life, we must also maintain a focus on your core goals. This doesn’t mean ignoring other aspects of your life, but rather staying disciplined in our approach to ensure that you achieve the outcomes you desire.

Together, we can create a balance where your need for exploration is acknowledged, but we remain focused on the objectives that will drive real change. By addressing these tendencies with compassion, we can build a coaching partnership that helps you overcome internal barriers and make steady, meaningful progress toward your goals.

Setting boundaries in coaching isn’t about limiting your potential—it’s about helping you reach it. By staying focused on what truly matters, you’ll see the results you’re aiming for and experience the personal and professional growth you desire. Let’s work together to ensure that every session is a step closer to your success.

Understanding the psychological reasons behind scope expansion can help me address the underlying cause and set effective boundaries with empathy and clarity. I can acknowledge their need for exploration while reminding my client that focusing on specific goals will lead to more tangible outcomes.

Another blog post where I explain how I maintain focus on my client’s agreed objectives: How I keep my coaching focused